Indulgence vs Restraint

During our class discussion, one of the survey questions asked: “Did you ever sleep in the same bed as your parents? Until what age?” This made me reflect on how, since a young age, I was raised to be independent. I believe this is something I would like to pass on to my own children. 

In many Western cultures, parenting tends to emphasise individualism, self-confidence, and clear personal boundaries. Children often sleep separately from their parents early on, which is seen as a step toward building autonomy. This contrasts with Japanese parenting, where co-sleeping is common well into elementary school. It highlights a cultural focus on interdependence and the concept of “amae,” nurturing deep family bonds. 

Using Hofstede’s model, these differences also relate to the dimension of Indulgence vs. Restraint. Western societies, being more indulgent, encourage expressing desires and enjoying life, which aligns with fostering personal independence. In contrast, Japan’s more restrained culture values harmony, discipline, and considering the group’s needs over individual impulses.

 Ultimately, I appreciate aspects of both. While I cherish my independent upbringing, I also admire Japan’s emphasis on family closeness. My goal is to raise my kids to be self-reliant but also empathetic and aware of how their actions affect others.

Comments

  1. AboodiJuly 7, 2025 at 11:18 PM

    I also fully agree with you! I want my own kids to be independent but ultimately I also want them to be strong family people when the time comes, I think it is important to have a balance of both aspects.

    ReplyDelete

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